As I Rise - The Decemberist - Her Majesty The Decemberists - 2003

6:45 AM came very early that Saturday in Berlin. I groggily answered the wake up call and then threw myself in the shower. Didn't want to drink coffee as I hoped to catch at least a little bit of sleep on the plane. I knew that if I didn't get at least a little bit more, I was going to be useless for the evening in London.

We got ourselves to the airport without too much incident, though both of us felt awful. Our flight was via EasyJet.

If you aren't familiar with EasyJet, it is a low cost ZERO frills airline that flies to locations within Europe for ridiculously low prices (I think I paid 40 Euros for this flight). The downside, as I mentioned, is the zero frills part. You pay for your baggage, you don't get an assigned seat or beverage service. It didn't matter to me, I just wanted to sleep.

We were, of course, to the airport way too early and had to sit and wait for the flight to board. I was afraid to let myself sleep as I was certain I'd sleep right through boarding. When I finally got to a seat on the plane, I put my hood up and was out like a light...not waking up till I was on the ground in England.

"London" Luton airport is only in London by the most generous of definitions. It's about 45 minutes north east of the city and requires a bus ride to get into town. As such I decided to take care of some business at the airport (TMI, I know, but it becomes relevant). So, I'm in the bathroom and I can tell that there are a bunch of British Teenagers in the bathroom with me. All of the sudden, and hand darts underneath my stall and tries to snatch the strap of my shoulder bag. The bag moved quick, but fortunately I was quicker and grabbed the strap and yanked back. I had the mild thrill of hearing my would be bag snatcher smack his body against the stall. And that was the last I heard of that.

I grabbed a cup of coffee and was fortunately feeling a bit more stable than I had been in Germany. We got on the bus and finally headed into the city to meet up with Rance, but our trip would still not be that easy. As I mentioned it was about 45 mintues outside the city, and the trip ended up taking closer to an hour and a half because the door of the bus would not stay closed. Every 5 minutes or so, the driver would pull over to the shoulder to try to fix the problem only for the door to open up again a few minutes into driving. Eventually he just gave up and drove like that.

After missing our stop and taking the underground back, we finally arrived at the hotel ready for the next portion of our adventure to begin. Rance was sitting in the lobby working on his laptop, and our room was ready in a few minutes.

When people think of The Decemberists, they probably think of this album. The ridiculous period pieces, the homoerotic subtexts, the wry commentary in obsolete dialouge, the stories told from the point of view of antiquated genre characters were all solidified on this album rather than their somewhat more restrained debut, or their more ambitious later albums. Having said that, this is probably the least Decemberist-esque song on the album. A simple porch-swing anthem carries the day all the way through with nary a Harlequin nor Brick-bat to be seen.

Apology Song - The Decemberists - 5 Songs EP - 2003

And speaking of obnoxiously literate people...I generally find the 5 Songs EP (on which this is the 6th song) to be the least annoying of The Decemberists' albums, but this is the most annoying song on it...though there are some moments of great comedy on it. Essientially, the apology in question is regarding a bicycle that the narrator was asked to watch while it's owner was in England. While in his care the bicycle was stolen.

The humor comes mostly (well other than the subject as a whole) from Meloy's attempt to imagine the fate of the bicycle ("I bet it's at the bottom of some French town's pond, rudely abused as some Hesher's joyride")...but the problem with this, along with most funny songs is, once the humor has worn off...you are left with a goofy obnoxious song.

Angel, Won't You Call Me - The Decemberists - 5 Songs EP - 2003

So, I have a relatively simple equation that goes into play to judge how much I like/dislike a Decemberists song. The equation looks something like this:

(Quirky Schtick - Actually Clever Lyrics) * Gay (literally) Subtext/Catchy Melody. You take the result of that and multiply by the square root of how much Colin Meloy's voice annoys you. If the result is relatively low, then you can probably stand the song.

I tend to like the Five Songs EP because it occurs so early in the bands career...before they were completely sure they could get away with the schtick. Meloy keeps it to a minimum. It really only pops out on My Mother Was A Chinese Trapeeze Artist and The Apology Song. The Gay subtext is non-existant, and the clever lyrics/catchy melody quotient is pretty high.

This certainly isn't my favorite song on the album, but it's not bad either.

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